The Twelve Days of Clitmas: 8th Day

Beth Simpson, Society and Community Editor

Look, we can’t deny the Boris-faced, virus-infested elephant in the room that this year hasn’t been great. But in the spirit of holiday cheer, I thought I would offer a bit of light relief from all of that by giving you a carefully crafted selection of holiday gifts. Yes, that’s right, I am joining the canon of Destiny’s Child, The Muppets and carol singers far and wide to give you my take on the Twelve Days of Christmas; the aptly named Twelve Days of Clitmas. For the last few weeks, I have been gathering nuggets of both wisdom and fun from many wonderful people, which I (your true love) will give to you (our Clitbait readers) as festive treats for the next twelve days. From holiday recipes, to wild swimming spots, to tips for a more pleasurable sex life, I hope there will be something in this for everyone! So, get the chestnuts roasting as I pop these gifts under the metaphorical tree and let’s end the year with a smile.

On the eighth day of Clitmas my true love sent to me…

Eight means o’ milkin’

For day eight, I have some sweet and creamy festive cocktails for you… I must say, when planning this gift, I made sure these drinks were accessible for the milk and non-milk drinkers among you. What I didn’t factor in was that many of you would not be alcohol drinkers. Please accept my apology! For those of you who are very admirably embarking on dry jan, as an alternative to this list, I urge you to begin your year with a milkshake and take a moment to feel PROUD OF YOURSELVES, whilst the rest of us hop back on the wagon to wring out the last few days of guiltfree (?) drinking. That said, I am partial to a banana Yazoo… Maybe I could give this whole dry jan thing a go.