Dear past me, sex shouldn’t hurt.

What would you tell your younger self about sex if you could? A member of our community opens up about their experience with vaginismus, a pelvic floor condition which makes penetrative sex difficult or impossible. Read more to find out about their experience.

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Dear Past Me

By drawing back this veil of shame we start having these conversations – no two periods are the same, no two menstruators are the same.

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Dear past me, the Christmas holidays will not always be so hard.

“sitting down at the dinner table is like letting go of unexploded ammunition and just waiting for it to go off. It’s painful to hear your parents – the ones supposed to protect you – endorse and exacerbate the very prejudices and misinformation that caused the traumatic injustices that you and your friends have had to experience.”

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Dear Past Me, don’t run away from life

Dear past me, don’t run away…

It’s 7pm, and I’m guessing you’re still in bed after aimlessly scrolling on social media that make you feel like your body is not toned enough and that you aren’t having as much fun as other people your age. You woke up, and it was dark. You decided you were going to stay in bed all day.

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Dear pre-trauma me, men will harm you more than once…

I can tell you now, even with everything men have put you through, you will still try to see the best in people. Sometimes this will be your downfall. They will gaslight you so much that you will start gaslighting yourself – I wish there was a way to warn you to always trust your intuition. If it feels off, that’s probably because it is…

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Dear Pre-Pandemic Me, Things are about to get hard again…

Everything around you is going to change. Significantly. You’ve felt loneliness before but not like this, this one is different. It’s going to be tough for a while but you’re going to emerge from it happy with your own company. Some days I have to work on it harder than others but you come to realise that you are enough as you are and that just showing up is okay…

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Dear Pre-Pandemic Me, Get ready for a wild few years…

The years coming will challenge you in lots of ways but they will make you stronger and appreciate just how many people you have around you. The pandemic makes you sit back and look at who and what are important to you, you’ll howl with laughter despite everything and realise that your parents are actually pretty awesome to spend time with…

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Dear Pre-Pandemic Me, Don’t ever shrink yourself again…

You started well, but you got lost.  You realised the importance of community; a community you connect with.  In the absence of love, you turned to appearances in a desperate attempt to change your circumstances.  It did not work.  You met the wrong people and did the wrong things, but it was not a waste.  But it did feel like it…

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Dear Past Me, Reincarnation is not just for the afterlife.

Dear Past Me, you’re a very feeling soul aren’t you? Your bookshelf is stacked with anthologies of poetry you’ll happily weep to, stories of chivalry and romance you’d gladly read again, and contemporary satires that will make you want to walk along the street feeling like you too could be in that novel. You pine for a world where you’re at the mercy of the beauty of life, and you’ll happily go along with that whether it be good or bad for you because all forms of beauty are beautiful after all…

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Dear past me, you’ll learn to love yourself amidst the chaos

Dear past me, you were something like a miracle child, a God-given blessing to parents who waited and prayed and longed for your birth for eighteen years. They’re older now, weaker, and fragile and it will be a heavy weight on your chest, a mountain or a volcano or a pile of rocks and stones only getting heavier with every passing moment. The crushing guilt of wanting a life of your own choosing, paving a way into a world that seems set against you, will bury you alive, suffocating you with its hands, screaming in your face about responsibilities and love and expectations, blaming you for the inevitable heartbreak they will feel…

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Dear Past Me, You got this!

Dear Past Me,

work hard and you’ll get there. its not about an end journey, more enjoying every step along the way! stay true to yourself and your goals, focus on what you’re best at and remember that perseverance and believing in yourself will be your best tools for building your future. you got this!’

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Dear Past Me, don’t worry about your boobs

I am writing to offer you reassurance. Even age twelve, you knew your own mind, and you were sure that large breasts were not something you wanted. I can assure you that age eighteen, they remain the size of mandarins or Madeleine cakes, and that you find this a completely ideal and comfortable size for them to be…

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